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Our beautiful and successful suburbsAll trash to recycling!

[Former] chain restaurant, NOS (Not Otherwise Specified), in our beautiful and successful suburbs. To lease.

Suburban schools are an essential component of suburbia.¿How could our suburbs be beautiful & successful without SATs & split-levels?Split-level houses ae an essetial part of suburbia.


Americans moved into Levittowns! Levels were split! Lawns were mowed! Mary Hartman saw the waxy yellow buidup on her kitschen floor! Big Macs were eaten! SUVs flourished! Americans got in their cars, and commuted (not death sentences)! We were: "Runnin' on empty, runnin' around!" (ref.: Jackson Browne song) ~ America's greatest contribution to the history of world architecture: The single family split level [or raised ranch...] suburban tract development house on 1/4 acre or more of grass lawn so why not just make it astroturf?

Go to Kaplan test prep website!

I have nothing against Kaplan: they are just trying to help kids whose parents have money, in the eternal war between studentkind and Educational Testing Service (ETS)(501)(c)(3), Princeton New Jersey. ETS are the Culture Criminals for testing kids in the first instance! Any port in a storm.
God save America!
All trash to recycling!

"The Democrats in D.C. have been and want to, at a much higher level, abolish our beautiful and successful suburbs by placing far-left Washington bureaucrats in charge of local zoning decisions," TrumpAll trash to recycling! said. "They are absolutely determined to eliminate single-family zoning, destroy the value of houses and communities already built, just as they have in Minneapolis and other locations that you read about today. Your home will go down in value, and crime rates will rapidly rise."

"What will be the end result," he added a bit later, "is you will totally destroy the beautiful suburbs. Suburbia will be no longer as we know it. So they wanted to defund and abolish your police and law enforcement while at the same time destroying our great suburbs. The suburb destruction will end with us." ((POTUS №45) Donald J. TrumpAll trash to recycling!, The Washington Post, +2020.07.17)

Single family suburban houses housing suburban nuclear families.

All trash to recycling!_Skin cancer of the topsoil_[1][2][3][5][6] All trash to recycling!

 
 
 
 
 

+2022.09.25 v037
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Next2a.gif Do you lust for more square feet?
Next2a.gif Listen to the perfect suburban conversation
Next2a.gif Fly south to Florida!
Next2a.gif Vacation in Lost Vegas!
Next2a.gif Put up with more American middle-class inanity
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Next2a.gif See the better part of suburbia

  


America is running on empty, running around....


See the U.S.A., in your Chevrolet, America is asking you to call! Drive the U.S.A. in your Chevrolet, America's the greatest land of all! ...

Presenting the supersonic 1953 Chevrolet Bel Air sedan! The chic sheet metal is all new for 1953! Mr. Organization Man! You will commute on your lap of luxury leatherette bench front seat, as many miles as you need to go, to get any office in the whole U.S.A. Seats 6 in comfort if you're in your office carpool. Or you wife will love chauffeuring you to and from the Metro North station, and taking the kids to soccer and tennis practice, ballet and gymnastics lessons, the doctor, the orthodontist, Kaplan SAT Prep and everywhere else in her busy June Cleaver days, in style. No clutch! Traffic-Jam-o-Matic transmission is standard. Powerful 186 horsepower straight six or optional 224 horsepower dual exhaust V-8, you're in command! Dinah Shore says it all: Life is completer in a 1953 Chevrolet! [Click image for a surprise][4]


Plunge into the depths of Despair: "See if there's anything good on." "Why bother?"I want my Mapo!Single family suburban nuclear family watching the television.Single family suburban nuclear family watching the television.
Music television, 'til the sun burns out....

A nuclear family being culturally irradiated



Footnotes

  1. 10:23 AM [+2022.03.26]. The New York Times. Your comment has been approved! Thank you for sharing your thoughts with The New York Times community. The Ameican dream of "home ownership" was always "a bill of goods": Few people ever own their homes: they own their mortgages, and "mort" means death. Death contracts. The banks own the homes, but the people mow the lawns and fix burst plumbing pipes.... As a child whose parents had bought a split level house they could not afford on an acre of lawn in an upscale suburban "dvelopment" when they could have had a much better house in-town for a lot less money and a lot less grass to mow -- one of our nextdoor neighbors died valiently in the line of duty: he had a heart attack on his ride on lawn mower. Ride 'em, lawnboy! Selling when housing prices are high is no diffeent than selling when prices are low: The new mortgage you buy will be at the same level of bloated or affordable price as the one you sold. It's a zero sum game. Today I have a neighbor who is a Gund Hall grad (an AIA architect). One fine day I saw her do[in]g servile labor attending to her lawn and I commented that I thought the gravel gardens in Japanese Buddhist temples, where the monks rake the gravel as medication, not mow grass just because it keep growing or whatever.... She did not like me reminding that there can be higher values in life than fertilizing the topsoil. Why don't people just replace the grass with astroturf?
  2. Your Comment on When the Best Available Home Is the One You Already Have
    The New York Times <comments@nytimes.com> 8:24 AM (3 minutes ago) [+2022.05.28]
    Your comment has been approved!
    Thank you for sharing your thoughts with The New York Times community.
    Bradford McCormick | New York
    Americans have been socially conditioned to want more not better. Some persons live in unsafe housing; many of them cannot afford better and that is a shame on ouur country. But the lust for more square feet just entails a bigger mortgage, and "mort" means: Death. I saw it in my own life. We had a lovely little house just a mile or so from President Clinton's home, with a Roman Catholic Church just across the street: The Virgin Mary watched our home 24/7. But my wife wanted more square feet. We got them. My commute (I hated commuting!) doubled. The new house had almost double mortgage. Oh and the carrying charges are so much more! For what? More more square feet. I recently went on the tour of the great architect Philip Johnson's national treasure Glass House. It's small. But it's very high quality. To live in it was to live in a masterpiece of art, not a Big Mac(Mansion). Ciches are only good when people want what they propagandize. Do good shings come in small packages or not? The great modernist architect Mies van der Rohe famously (or infamously, if you are a post-modernist fashionista) said: "Less is more". NIMBY
  3. Your Comment on How 'Fairy Tale' Farms Are Ruining Hudson Valley Agriculture
    The New York Times <comments@nytimes.com>
    Sat, Jun 11, 7:14 AM (18 hours ago)
    Your comment has been approved!
    Thank you for sharing your thoughts with The New York Times community.
    Bradford McCormick | New York
    Farmers are losing properties to wealthy buyers from the city, while leasing land from the new owners can feel like a "modern-day feudal system." What's wrong with that sentence? Maybe the: "feel like" should be replaced by: "can be"? Nobody ever taught me in school that Abraham Lincoln thoiught the difference between slavery and wage labor was that the former was a permanent condition. America is the land of the free and the home of the brave and we hold these truths be self-evident that all men are created equal and endowed by their creator with the right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness? What absentee grazing land owner is trying to pull their leasee's sheep's wool over our eyes?
  4. Q: "Mrs. Soccer Mom and Mr. Tball Dad! Do you realize your profligately energy wasting lifestyle has caused the global temperature to heat up which is resulting in ever more horrific climate catastrophies?" A: "If you say so. We guess that's the way it had to be. The kids simply had wait in line for the rides in Disneyworld at least once in their life for their social adjustment. What's the problem?"
  5. Your Comment on Mr. Biden, Tear Down This Highway
    The New York Times <comments@nytimes.com>
    8:32 AM (42 minutes ago) [+2022.09.09]
    Your comment has been approved!
    Bradford McCormick | New York
    Many years ago on the CBS Evening News, Eric Sevareid eloquently said: "America has taken the automobile into its heart, and the automobile has taken over America." And, of coursse, Joni Mitchell: "We paved Paradise, put in a parking lot. Don't it always seem to go that you don't know what you've got 'til it's gone." Robert Moses leading usto the Promised suburban single family tract housing Land.
  6. Your Comment on Whatever Happened to the Starter Home?
    The New York Times <comments@nytimes.com>
    2:34 PM (8 hours ago) [+2022.09.23]
    Your comment has been approved!
    Bradford McCormick | New York
    Aericans are obsessed with"More square feet!" as part of "The American Dream" of single family suburbn tract development houses with long automobile commutes to work and having to drive the car for everything else like buying groceries. Everybody lusts to put additions on their mortgages (few people acually own their home; the bank owns it and they are the mort-gagees -- "mort" as in mortuary). I have nevver heard of home subtraction remodelling (kids learn to both add and subtract in school, yes?). When the kids grow up theparents move to a different place instead of downsizing in place. But for Americans, their homes are not just domicilage: they are negotable financial instruments. And sometimee the money aspect takes precedence over the nesting aspect, especially with the kind of people who like to buy a house and flip it, ike a giant meat patty on the grill. The great modernist architect Ludwig Mies vann der Rohe said two things that are relevant here, the more famous one being: "Less is more" (America's Robert Venturi who learned from Las Vegas countered: "Less is a bore"). Mies also said something else abou tthe quality of work: "God is in the details". Most suburban tract homes, from Levittown to Robert A.M. Stern MacMansions strike me as godless (even stuff like fake mullions in the windows). But the people do worship their lawns (in Japan, Buddhist monks rake fine gravel "dry gardens" for meditation.) "More square feet, now!"
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